Forever and a Damn Day Part III
“The mirror is a powerful tool because it forces you to deal with yourself on a deeper level. ”
Photo by jurien huggins on Unsplash
I woke up hating life this morning.
I'm laying here busted and broken with that horrible feeling that you get when you think you're about to die. I accept my fate. There's no way I could face my family after that epic failure. What explanations could I possibly give for how I disfigured my body and still haven't popped the question? I can hear Twiggy heckling right along with my Grandma's disappointment. "That was all God, Janny. The good Lord knocked you straight on yo ass, cause a woman has no business proposing". And my ever so judgmental mother, "See what happens when you try to take matters into your own hands? You fall flat on your face. Or in your case your knee". Nope, not dealing with that tsunami. Forget about Twiggy's wedding. She'll get over it. I'm going to close my eyes to stop my head from spinning, take a deep breath, and sink my weak, broken, lifeless body deeper into the couch.
Photo courtesy of New Line Cinema
A little while later, the sweet aroma of my favorite West End Blend coffee, coming from the kitchen, immediately brings me back to life. That beautiful scent takes me back to our first date at the Urban Grind Coffeehouse. They have the best coffee in Atlanta, hands down. It was open mic night, Anderson surprised me with a poem like Darius did for Nina in Love Jones. He knew how much I love that scene. It was his way of loosening me up. I was nervous, and it was apparent with my one-word answers and lack of eye contact. I didn't want to admit how much I was feeling him. He broke those emotional walls down with little to no effort. He made me feel special in a room full of thirty plus people. That's when I decided that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him.
Photo by Jason Wong on Unsplash
My beautiful memory was interrupted by dishes clacking together. I slowly lever my eyelids open and quickly shut them as I notice Anderson peeking around the corner. I'm not ready to face him yet. I'm hurt, angry, and embarrassed all at the same time. Realistically I can't blame him. He didn't know that I was going to propose to him last night, which makes me responsible for the hurt and humiliation. But, he did ignore my calls and text messages, and he hung up on me. So I have all the right not to want to deal with him right now. I do want a cup of coffee, though.
I pry open one eye to see who's calling me. Twiggy's name is flashing across the screen. Nope. I don't wanna talk to her either. But wait, what is that next to Anderson's phone? I sit up to get a closer look. I'm blinking both eyes until it is precisely clear that I am seeing what I think I'm seeing. I thrust my aching body onto one side, reach over, and "Good morning Jay," he says with a kiss to my forehead. He could've kept that one. "Hey," I grunted as I tried to rearrange my body. He sits his wet, fresh out of the shower body down in front of me. Usually, that's all the distraction that I would need to forget that I'm upset, and whatever is in that little black box. But no, not this time, buddy. I was ready to read him his rights. But then his lips moved from my forehead down the bridge of my nose and landed on my lips. I got lost in the moment. When his hand moved up my thigh and tickles the kitty, I forgot everything chile!.
"Ouch," I screamed.
He pulls up. "Wassup?" he says, all concerned.
"It's my knee."
He looks down and notices it's two times bigger than the left knee and giggles.
"What's so funny, Anderson?" He pauses before responding.
"You had too much to drink last night, didn't you?" he continues laughing. I'm not seeing the humor in this. He slides down and lightly kisses my knee.
"I missed you last night." Just as he said that his kisses begin to feel like annoying pecks.
"Ouch," I murmured as I sat up and moved my leg away from him.
"I didn't hear you come in last night," that's right, girl, keep it calm and collective.
"You were asleep, and I didn't want to wake you."
Really, because you've wakened me up plenty of times before. Here he goes, rubbing my thigh again. Don't let him win, Jay. Ask him where he was and who he was with. No sooner than I can open my mouth,
"I have a surprise for you."
Photo by Ryan Pouncy on Unsplash
Anderson grabs his towel from off the floor and wraps it around his waist picks up the small gift box. Oh shit. It's my ring in that little box. This makes up for last night, hell it makes up for everything. My heart is racing. Then my phone buzzes. It's Twiggy. We both stare at it before deciding not to answer. I am too busy trying to maintain my excitement. My man is finally going to propose to me. It's been eight years, eight long beautiful years. Then, he looks at me long and hard. My heart feels like it's about to jump out of my chest. "After the wedding. I don't want Twiggy calling us out from the alter for being late." WTF, Twiggy doesn't live here. She's got her mate. I'm 'bout sick of her ass in my business.
Photo by Thomas William on Unsplash
Thank God,
we had enough time to stop at Express Care to get my knee and hand looked at. I had to hobble down the aisle on crutches, but it was worth it, seeing my favorite cousin tie the knot. I have never seen Twiggy so happy. Although, she kept mean mugging me. I guess she's mad because I didn't return any of her calls or messages last night.
The entire family sat together at the reception. This usually isn't a problem. However, Grandma Flo kept giving me that look. What I do now? If looks could kill. That woman is something else. She would be sweet as pie one minute, and Satan's spawn the next. My only goal in life has been to stay on her good side. I've seen what the ugly side is capable of, and bay bay, I don't want any parts of her. She and Aunt Maug are over there talking shit. Old ladies don't know how to be discrete. They'll look right at you as they're talking. I knew what was coming for me when they interrupted Anderson and Grandad's conversation.
"Hey, Anderson," Grandma started. Aunt Maug sat with her hands crossed, and the sternest look in her eyes as she waits for her turn. Don't interrogate my man, not now.
"When do you plan on walking my grandbaby down the aisle?" Oh shit. I turn to Grandad with a look of desperation. Like c'mon man, get your wife.
"What aisle?" Anderson chuckles while sipping his drink.
"Na-huh, you can't joke your way out of this. You know good and well what aisle I'm talking about." Grandma continues. Grandad, please, please get-cha wife.
"Janny, how long are you gonna play house with him? You know we Hawthorne women have a reputation." Aunt Maug and her two cents. She doesn't know that I know more about her reputation than she thinks I know. She wasn't always a saint.
"Ladies, times have changed. People aren't rushing to the altar for status and security like in your day." Both Grandma and Aunt Maug sat straight up.
"Times may have changed, but morals and traditions have not." She said, pointing her finger. When Aunt Maug's old ass points her finger, she's not playing.
"We have morals. We have a solid relationship based on trust and honesty. We don't need an overpriced ceremony to prove how much we love each other." You tell 'em, babe.
"So you believe shacking up for eight years is pleasing in the eyes of God?" And that's my cue. Whenever older women start talking about God or religion, the conversation is over. I grabbed Anderson by the arm and led him to the dance floor.
I waited all day for Anderson's surprise. I thought he planned to propose at the wedding. I damn near lost my mind every time he said, "be right back." I was expecting him to return with a band or a string quartette, or some local singer singing On Bended Knee by Boyz II Men. But nothing. He claims he was taking calls all day. I've waited eight years for us to have a real future together. Is this what our forever is going to be like? Me waiting around for him to come through? Well, I waited for this long. I can give it a few more hours.
He was quiet on the car ride home.
Odd. I wonder if he's nervous? Once we reached home, he asked me to grab a bottle of champagne from the wine cabinet and two glasses. I didn't bother to ask why. He ordered Alexa to play Roll Some Mo by Lucky Daye before he went to change. I sang and hobbled to the music. I popped open a bottle of Cristal and poured each of us a glass. He came creeping around the corner dressed in his silk robe and slippers. He took me by the hand, grabbed his drink, and lead me out to the deck.
Photo by Alexis Antonio on Unsplash
The night sky was glorious. The moon appears to shine brighter than ever before. Anderson's smile was more gorgeous than I ever saw before. He raises his glass and stares deep into my eyes and says, "January Renaissance Hawthorne, you're the most wonderful person in the world." I tried so hard to hold back my tears until they came rushing down my face. "I've become a better man since you've entered my life," he continues and wipes my tears away. "What I'm trying to say is, I love you, baby." He pulls out the box and lays it on the table. Tears are gushing at this point. "Go ahead, open it." I sat my glass down, wipe my eyes, take a deep breath....the box is empty! He laughs himself into a convulsion. I stood there, watching him jump around like a damn fool. I felt like bashing his head in with the champagne bottle—eight years of my life... What, am I a joke?
PUBLISHER’S NOTE: This website, DREEMCHLD.COM, is copyrighted, and no part of this website may be copied, reproduced, recorded, or used in any manner. Copyright © DreemchildMediaGroup
